Girls who cook cakes on sundays

It was christmas in Istambul and I was seated beside the Bosphorus Strait, enjoying of the winter sun with one of the most beautifull woman I have ever known beside me. She was a friend in the far and for many times we spoke about our lifes, our dreams, our hopes and our struggles by the internet. And suddenly, when we had lost hope there we were, sharing the sun and the sea and the seagulls and the ships and a bank.
I don't know why, but I opened my heart. I told her all about me. About my sadness, my loneliness, my missing. About how I tried to face life like nothing happened. I opened a tear in my armour and leat her come in, to the place where I was more fragile than anywhere.
And she didn't take it. She didn't get it. I was so shocked, further from simply disappointment. What was going on there ? It wasn't like she didn't speak english, but it was quite clear that we weren't sharing a language. We didn't comunicate.
Time passed and we did other things. And sunday afternoon we came back from a walk. She asked me, as it was quite call, if I wouldn't mind if she cooks some cakes. I was surprised - it's not my kind of thing -, and of course I am not the kind of people who says someone what to do and what not. Anyway as I have said, I was curious. So i asked.
- Do you use to do this on sunday evening ? Cook cakes ?
- If I am not going out with my boyfriend, yes. I find it relaxing.
And suddenly I saw it clear. There was our mistake. There was the lack of comunication. I don't need anyone to fulfill my life. I don't need anything to " relax " me. I want to live life and I want activities. Relax ? I don't have time to relax. I am hungry about life. Sometimes I want to rest, but this is just a breathe to gather energies for the next storm. That's why she couldn't understand me. We lived in different worlds. The world of the girls who cook cakes on sundays and the world of the girls who wouldn't ever cook cakes on sundays, cause they are so busy doing many other things.

Today I remenbered this story and I told it to a friend of me, Charles. I don't know why, but when I finished he embraced me. That was great. Sometimes I feel me like an island, who lives an isolated life that drives to no conclusion, and any wisdom that I can save will be lost when I disappear. And then suddenly someone appears, listen to what you say and answers " Wow guy, I got you there ". And everything worths. It's like a light in the middle of the world, gives you a reason to keep on. I am happy because of it.
Last year I tried to be responsible. I tried to be a good guy. I tried to be a guy-who-cook-cakes. But then Rabanal saved of myself and showed me that doesn't matter what you try, you are what you are and there is no reason to change it. Simply enjoy of yourself and be the best posible version of you. That's the amazing lesson he taught me, and that's what I want to share with you. Doesn't matter if you are a girl who cook cakes other not. Simply be happy of being yourself.